Not Today

Clearly we didn't get out of here today. Early this morning the nurse came in and told us that the doctor had already ordered labs for tomorrow, so she didn't think we were going home. She was right. They told me when they came on rounds that we can't go home until her ANC shows some number other than zero. While everything else is rising nicely, platelets, hemoglobin, monocyte, her ANC is still zero. Once it shows a number they will be confident it will continue rising an she can go home safely. Right now though she still has zero defenses against any bacterial infections and it would be unsafe for her to leave the hospital. So....all of our prayers tonight are for some segs and bands to show up on her labs in the morning ... those segs and bands are part of the formula that give her ANC a number, I know it's extremely confusing, but I don't make the rules!

We had a rough night last night. Chelsea was up every hour after 1am. I thought it would be a good night since she was asleep by 10:00, but she just kept waking up crying. A couple of times it was just on her own and then a couple of times I just think she was awoken when the nurse was trying to change her or draw labs. Then this afternoon she was extremely tired. I got her to sleep and rocked her for a while, then laid her in the crib and dashed to the bathroom. I was hoping to run down to the cafeteria and grab some lunch before they closed at 2:00. As soon as I sat down to pee, I heard a man's voice, "knock knock, is your mom here?" I hurried out, but by that time he was gone...and Chelsea was awake! I was fuming...I'm telling you, this was not the day to get on my bad side! At this point in the day, I was disappointed we weren't leaving, I was homesick, hungry, tired, and may I mention had the PMS bug...and here some man walks into our room and wakes my sleeping baby!!! So I marched out into the hallway in search of this mystery man, I wanted to know what was so important he couldn't wait. Turns out he was just some delivery guy from the home health department delivering our supplies for our discharge. Luckily for him he was gone and didn't have to endure the wrath of Carey. We spent the rest of the day trying to stay cheerful, but Chelsea and I both were rather grumpy. By 4:00 she wasn't playing and mostly just crying because she was tired, so I tried to lay down with her in my bed. She of course wasn't having it, so out of desperation I asked the nurse for some relief so I could close my eyes for a while. She gladly took her up to the nurses station and I got some shut eye. It was exactly what I needed! By the time I woke up it was dinner time, some volunteers had made a home cooked meal for the parents and it was delicious! So the day ended on a little happier note! Now my angel sleeps peacefully in her bed....she is OUT! I flushed her lines tonight (all by myself) and she didn't even move a muscle. I've had to practice doing some of her care the past couple of days so I will feel comfortable when we get home. Yesterday I even did my first dressing change! A little traumatizing, but I did it! And if I must say so myself, it looks pretty darn good!